matchmaking Archives - The Crush Confidential

The Three-Date Rule: Why You Shouldn’t Judge Compatibility Too Quickly

Posted on August 27, 2025August 27, 2025 by Amanda Hood

When it comes to dating, first impressions carry a lot of weight. But at The Crush Confidential, we believe that real compatibility takes time to reveal itself. That’s why we encourage all of our clients to embrace what we call the Three-Date Rule.

Too often, people dismiss a potential partner after just one meeting — maybe the conversation wasn’t effortless, maybe nerves got in the way, or maybe the “spark” wasn’t instant. But here’s the truth: genuine chemistry often needs space to grow.

Why Three Dates Matter

First-Date Nerves Are Real
Many singles put too much pressure on the first date. You’re both trying to impress, gauge compatibility, and decide if there’s a future — all in a single evening. No wonder it feels overwhelming! By the second or third date, those walls start to come down and authenticity has a chance to shine.
(Curious why first impressions aren’t always accurate? Check out Psychology Today’s research on first impressions.)
Chemistry Can Be Subtle
Attraction doesn’t always strike like lightning. Sometimes, it builds slowly as you discover shared values, humor, and lifestyle alignment. A person who feels “just okay” on date one might feel like an amazing match by date three.
(Related: our blog on How to Spot Your Relationship Green Flags dives deeper into this idea.)
Lifestyle Alignment Takes Time
One of the most important parts of a lasting relationship is whether your day-to-day lives and long-term goals truly fit together. These aren’t always obvious in the first conversation, but a few dates in, you’ll start to notice how naturally your rhythms align.
(See also: The Gottman Institute’s research on long-term compatibility.)

How to Approach the Three-Date Rule

Go in with curiosity, not judgment. Instead of looking for red flags on date one, try noticing small green flags that could grow into something meaningful.
Be open to surprises. The person who doesn’t immediately sweep you off your feet might actually be the partner who fits your lifestyle and future best.
Give yourself permission to slow down. Love isn’t a race, and taking three dates to decide is a way of investing in your future clarity.

For more on this approach, read our blog: Intentional Dating: Why Slowing Down Leads to Stronger Connections.

The Bottom Line

The Three-Date Rule is not about forcing chemistry that isn’t there — it’s about giving compatibility the chance to show up. At The Crush Confidential, we’ve seen countless success stories come from clients who were patient enough to let sparks turn into something lasting.

So before you say “no” after one date, consider saying “yes” to two more. You might be surprised at the connection waiting to unfold.

How to Talk to Your Kids About Your Dating Life (Without the Guilt)

Posted on July 16, 2025July 16, 2025 by Amanda Hood

Dating as a single parent can be emotional—and not just for you. The thought of talking to your kids about your dating life can bring up uncertainty, awkwardness, or even guilt.

But here’s a gentle reminder:
You’re allowed to want love.
And showing your kids what healthy relationships look like—at any stage of life—is a powerful, positive thing.

Here are five thoughtful tips for navigating this conversation with honesty and care:

1. **Get Clear on How You Feel First**

Before bringing your kids into the conversation, take a moment to reflect on where you’re at emotionally. Are you excited? Nervous? Unsure? A little bit of everything?

Being aware of your own feelings helps you approach the topic calmly and intentionally. Kids pick up on energy more than words—so when you feel steady, it helps them feel safe.

2. Adjust the Conversation to Their Age

Younger kids don’t need details. Older kids might have more questions. Keeping the message age-appropriate can ease tension and make the conversation more natural.

Younger kids:
“I’m going to spend time with a new friend. It’s someone who makes me happy.”

Teens:
“I’ve decided to start dating again. It’s important for me to build connection, just like it is for anyone.”

You don’t need to over-explain. Just offer honest, simple information.

3. Reassure Them of Their Place in Your Life

One of the most important things kids need to hear is:
“You’re still my priority.”

Make it clear that dating doesn’t change how much they matter to you. Let them know that any relationship you pursue will only move forward if it’s healthy—for you and for them.

4. Don’t Introduce Everyone You Date

This one’s important: kids don’t need to meet every person you go on a few dates with. It’s often best to wait until a relationship feels stable before introducing someone new into your children’s world.

If and when you do make that introduction, keep it low-key. A short meeting at a neutral place (like a coffee shop or park) can feel more relaxed for everyone.

5. Make Space for Their Feelings

Even if you do everything “right,” your child might still feel uncomfortable, confused, or even upset. That’s okay. Let them feel what they feel without trying to fix it immediately.

You can say something like:
“I know this is new, and it’s okay to feel however you feel. I’m here to listen.”

A Final Thought

There’s no perfect script for this conversation, but the fact that you’re thinking about it means you care—and that matters most. You can be a loving, present parent and still make space for a fulfilling personal life.

It’s not about choosing one or the other. It’s about building a life where both can exist in harmony.

Featured on Now in the Nati: Why It’s Time for Single Parents to Prioritize Love

Posted on July 9, 2025July 9, 2025 by Amanda Hood

We were honored to be featured in Now in the Nati, where Amanda shared what it really looks like to date as a single parent—and why it’s more than just possible… it’s powerful.

At The Crush Confidential, 95% of our clients are single parents. That’s not a typo. Most of the incredible people we work with are juggling carpools, careers, and co-parenting—while still carving out space for love. And while that can feel daunting, it’s absolutely doable with the right mindset (and the right matchmaker).

Here’s the truth Amanda shared:
Lifestyle alignment is everything. When you’re a single parent, compatibility isn’t just about chemistry—it’s about rhythm. Does this person understand what your Tuesday night looks like with three kids and a soccer tournament? Are they someone who supports the kind of life you’ve built—not someone who makes you feel like you have to explain or apologize for it?

We don’t just match based on interests or physical attraction—we dig into how you live, what you value, and what your day-to-day really looks like. Because that’s what determines lasting connection.

And for our empty nesters, Amanda had another piece of advice:
Don’t box yourself in geographically.
Maybe your kids are grown. Maybe your life is more flexible than it’s ever been. This is your chance to expand your horizons. Your soulmate might not live in your zip code—or even your state. That’s why we encourage open minds and open hearts when it comes to location.

Finally, Amanda reminds single parents to prioritize their dating life. Yes, your time is limited. But love is not selfish. Making room for it doesn’t take away from your kids—it sets an example for what healthy, joyful relationships look like.

So if you’re a single parent who’s been putting love on the back burner, consider this your sign:
Your story isn’t on pause. It’s just beginning.

👉 Watch the full interview on Now in the Nati here:
The Crush Confidential on Dating as a Single Parent